Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Bad dreams


Weighed in this morning - not as part of the Biggest Loser but simply to see what the last week or more had done. Was pleasantly surprised to find a gain of only 2 pounds. Ate too many pistachios and protein bars.

But did get to the gym for 2.08 miles on the treadmill and made 10,906 steps.

The movie today at the cardio-theater was The Incredibles. Not a bad movie, but I misread the sign and had anticipated Casino Royale. So I used my iPod and started listening to The Hobbit. Bilbo has now gone to bed after listening to the dwarves talk about their adventure. Bad dreams plague his sleep.

This evening I watched Shake Hands with the Devil. It is the story of General Romeo Dallaire who commanded the United Nations forces in Rwanda at the time of the genocide. The forces were badly understaffed and inadequately supplied. They also had a mandate that did not fit the situation.

Dallaire was not perfect as a commander. But he did more than virtually anyone else. In a situation where the entire world failed the people of Rwanda - ignored the people of Rwanda - turned away from the people of Rwanda - Dallaire tried. He saved thousands, yet remains forever haunted by the hundreds of thousands he could not save. His command failed. But it was set up for failure. Dallaire continues to wrestle with guilt over the nightmare - guilt that nearly consumed him - guilt that is not shared by those who bear far more responsibility, those who created the conditions for the failure, who carried out the killings, who stood by, who looked away - by the genocidaires, Belgium, the Catholic Church, the UN, the United States, France.

Ten years after the genocide, the attitude of the Rwandans is summed up in these words: "We've come to expect nothing from the world and the world never disappoints us in that way."

Will the world do better in Haiti? I pray so.

I also watched Richard III with Laurence Olivier. He too was plagued by bad dreams.

Tomorrow (or today since it is well after midnight) I drive to Nashville.

May you sleep well. May I sleep well.

1 comment:

  1. Ok, I wouldn't sleep well either with images of Rwanda in my head. Personally, I can't watch or read anything too sensitive before bed or I just keep processing it in my sleep. Even with something mundane as a favorite drama, e.g. Big Love on HBO, I've continued to process it while I sleep.

    A two pound weight gain, eh? It may be water retention. When one begins working out more regularly, there are times when the body just retains water for a few days, and then there is a dramatic weight loss. I read this in the one Bob Greene book I own. It's his first book with Oprah on the cover.

    So, my message is to stay encouraged. The setback may actually be your body readjusting.

    Travel safely...

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